Monthly Archives: January 2010


Tim Tebow terrifies feminists

By Katie and Amie Kieffer
Image credit: AP Images / Phil Sandlin

Heisman Trophy winner and Florida Gators quarterback, Tim Tebow, is a favorite heading into the NFL spring draft. A favorite among football fans and pro-life Americans, that is. Puppy-faced Tebow, who loves his mom and isn’t afraid to hug her in public, is on the receiving end of trash-talking, bitter feminists. Continue reading

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Homeless haute couture

By Katie Kieffer


Homeless haute couture. Doesn’t that sound sweet? What could be more loving than clothing the poor and destitute on the streets?

The answer, sadly, is anything but homeless haute couture. Homeless haute culture is nothing more than a safe layer of wearable bubble-wrap for elite paper gangsters to profit from poverty and ignore reality. Continue reading

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Rachelize our recession

By Katie Kieffer

Rachel Alexandra wins Preakness. (Matthew Stockman/Getty Images)

The answer to ending the U.S. recession comes straight from the horse’s mouth: “Rachelize it.”

No, I’m not calling Rachel Green a horse or suggesting Rachel Uchitel could solve our monetary affairs even better than she could pull off an affair with Tiger. I’m talking about sitting down in the stable and listening to the real stories of Rachel Alexandra. This bay filly racehorse – voted Horse of the Year by a wide margin – has some advice on how the U.S. can pull off the biggest win for the economy.
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How the NFL rushes owners

By Katie Kieffer

Image credit:

Here’s a dirty little secret: Pittsburgh Steelers owner and chairman, Dan Rooney, has used his position, fans and the NFL franchise for personal and political gain. While he is credited with bringing coaching opportunities to minorities, a dig beneath the surface reveals otherwise.

Humility is a virtue, and Rooney lacks it. In 2003, he instigated the creation of a rule that would require the NFL to identify and interview a minority candidate for all head and senior-level coaching positions. The rule was named the Rooney Rule as a permanent tribute to Rooney’s “benignity” and an honor to the Rooney family legacy.
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Escape recession in France?

By Katie Kieffer

Art by Ben David.

Americans want relief from depression, recession and inflation. Poseur Americans are increasingly gravitating towards French culture in an attempt to escape economic doldrums. Touché, even Tiger Woods may consider an escapist move to France in the wake of his admitted affairs.

I first noticed this trend when one of my besties wore a rhinestone-studded Eiffel Tower necklace from popular Forever21. Her bling was cute – but annoying – simultaneously. Why couldn’t it be a bejeweled Chicago Spire or Empire State Building?
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Posted in Economy, Entertainment & Culture | 3 Comments