Category Archives: Law

Jan
05

When Orangutans Get Lawyers

Monkeys are not people. Trees are not children. And human beings are not causing the earth to melt like the Wicked Witch of the West.

“It’s probably the equivalent of watching your family getting shot before a firing squad,” environmental extremist Tom Whitaker described his emotional response to logging for National Geographic in July of 2000.

Fast forward to December of 2014: a 29-year-old orangutan named “Sandra” was represented by a lawyer named Andres Gil Dominguez who helped the ape win human rights in an Argentine court of law. Continue reading

Posted in Economy, Law | Comments Off

Dec
22

No Room for Vets in the Inn

Homeless American veterans shiver in the bitter cold while illegal immigrants receive subsidized four-year degrees.

At midnight, in Bethlehem, in piercing cold, Christ was born in a stable after his parents were turned away by every innkeeper. Joseph and Mary did not respond with entitlement: “If you don’t shelter us, then you’re racist.” Rather, they used their ingenuity to find an alternative birthplace for their son among friends—farm animals, shepherds, kings, and angels—beneath the light of an extraordinary star. Continue reading

Posted in Law, National Security | 2 Comments

Nov
24

Obama Flips Blacks on Backs

How does the first black president reward blacks for voting for their hero?

With an executive order: “Go to the back of the employment line. Get behind illegal immigrants, including carriers of tuberculosis and criminals at large. Blessed are the politically useful and illegal immigrants are more useful than African Americans.” Continue reading

Posted in Economy, Law, National Security | 1 Comment

Sep
22

USPS: Where The Customer Is Always Last

Bang! Lee looked up from addressing a package while she waited in line for service at the post office. Despite a lobby packed with customers—without notice—a postal worker slammed down the service window gate and went to lunch, leaving Lee and the other patrons to fend for themselves.

The U.S. Postal Service excels at treating customers poorly. My friend Lee’s story is but one of many nightmares of churlish postal workers and deficient USPS customer service. Many government workers get away with behavior that would get them fired if they worked at a private company like McDonald’s or Apple. Continue reading

Posted in Law | 1 Comment

Aug
18

Welcome to Juristic Park

Steven Speilberg directed Jurassic Park 21 years ago. Barack Obama is now directing Juristic Park. Hold onto your popcorn. T. Rex is back.

The Tyrannosaurus Rex is one of the most dangerous land carnivores in world history. In the 1993 movie Jurassic Park, a genetically engineered T. Rex viciously attacks the park’s tourists after a duplicitous park employee deactivates the park’s electric fences. Continue reading

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Apr
21

Help Wanted: Girls Gone Wild to Replace Lois Lerner

Female, feisty and unemployed? Fear not! Obama will need to hire IRS Girls Gone Wild to replace Lois Lerner.

To secure his legacy and help Democrats win future elections, Obama needs to replace former IRS Director of Exempt Organizations Lois Lerner, his number one Agency Girl Gone Wild. Lois has already been replaced in name since she retired (with full benefits!) on September 23, 2013. But, Obama still needs to find a mini Lois Lerner. Continue reading

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Apr
07

A Story of Love and Liberty

Americans are incredibly generous individuals. Last week, when tragedy tore two young lovers apart—anonymous donors across the nation reached out, proving that individual goodness trumps social welfare.

24-year-old Indianapolis resident Nathan Trapuzzano stepped out the door last Monday, April 1 for his traditional morning walk on the west side. Nathan had high hopes for his life. He had recently moved to Indianapolis and was enjoying his career as a computer programmer. He was a year into his marriage to Jennifer—the love of his life—a stunning strawberry blonde with a gorgeous smile. Continue reading

Posted in Law | 1 Comment

Mar
24

Stop No-Knock SWAT Attacks

Gun owners beware. Squirt gun owners, that includes you. If a Special Weapons and Tactics (SWAT) team SUSPECTS you of crime, you may receive a late-night visit from an armed SWAT team.

That’s right, an armed and militant SWAT team could trot right through your front door as you slumber this summer. No-knock warrants are increasingly used by military-style police units, like SWAT teams for drug raids. Unfortunately, SWAT teams can obtain these warrants too easily from judges and consequently do not always perform sufficient due diligence. As a result, tens of thousands of decent, law-abiding American citizens are surprised every year by a no-knock visit when the SWAT team gets it wrong. Continue reading

Posted in 2nd Amendment, Law | 1 Comment

Feb
17

The Wolf of the White House

Awooooooo! The Wolf of the White House howls incessantly. Over twenty-nine times, the wolf called out unilateral changes to the Affordable Healthcare Act.

Twenty-nine times! I’m tired of this wolf. He’s disturbing the peace and making it impossible for me to sleep at night.

Last week, I woke up at 3:30 a.m. to the sound of a wolf call. I threw my earplugs against the wall in frustration and vowed to buy those gargantuan Bose noise-cancelling headphones. The headphones worked like a charm. I couldn’t hear the wolf and I slept soundly. Well, for about two nights. Continue reading

Posted in Health Care, Law | 1 Comment

Oct
21

Senate Scores Big Victory for 2nd Amendment

Tired of depressing news? Smile, because here is some very positive news: 50 U.S. Senators—both Democrats and Republicans—have pledged to stop Obama’s latest attack on the Second Amendment.

Last week, all 50 senators wrote a letter to Obama pledging not to ratify the United Nations’ Arms Trade Treaty. In order for this treaty to be ratified, it would need 60 “yay” votes in the Senate. This means, gun owners will not need to forfeit their God-given right to self-defense and President Obama is on notice that his latest attack on the Second Amendment is dead on arrival in the Senate. Continue reading

Posted in 2nd Amendment, Law, National Security | 2 Comments