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Jul
18
2011
Skyscraper impetus creates jobs
18, JulBy Katie Kieffer
By Katie Kieffer When Michael Moore looks at a skyscraper, he sees a bloated monument to rich investors. He becomes nauseous and his lunch floats back up into his throat as he imagines the tenants who can afford Class A rent: Tenants like a semi-retired banker and his entrepreneurial son who watch the sun rise from their 92nd floor office suite while their assistant pours cold, crystal-clear water into tall glasses holding cucumber slices. “Hmmm, how can I knock that tower down and humble those richies?” Moore wonders to himself. “I certainly can’t push it over. I’d have to give up my breakfast of chocolate covered bacon and hit the gym every morning. Way too much work for a big boy like me. … I’ve got it! I’ll ask the President to push for eliminating the carried interest tax break!”
Jul
11
2011
Agency girl goes wild
11, JulBy Katie Kieffer
2011 Edition
By Katie Kieffer Elizabeth Warren has literally gone wild. No, she did not strip off her matronly suit on a Girls Gone Wild spring break tour bus. Rather, she appears to be on a mission to strip Congress, small businesses and individual Americans of authority by instituting her own rules for how to play the financial game on both Wall Street and Main Street. Liberals in the media hail Warren as the “protector of the middle class.” Warren may genuinely care about the middle class. Her own mantra is: “Dang gummit, somebody has got to stand up on behalf of the middle class!” Sadly, she does not understand the free markets that prevent the middle class from slipping into poverty.
Posted in Economy, Humor, Law
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Jul
04
2011
Set off Katy Perry fireworks
04, JulBy Katie Kieffer
By Katie Kieffer Imagine this: It’s the Fourth of July. You are a notorious pyro and your frightened neighbor lady sways you into reading my column on her flashy new iPad to temporarily distract you from setting up your annual fireworks display. As you read this, she is “accidentally” dropping her garden hose, running full blast, on the pile of fireworks you’ve been stashing up all year. Yes, by now, your fireworks are wet garbage. Don’t panic. Keep reading. Trust me, she’s not as sneaky as she thinks. I’ll tell you how to ignite your neighborhood with a show like it has never seen before. You won’t even need to make an emergency run to the tent down the street selling fireworks.
Posted in Economy, Entertainment & Culture, Humor
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Jun
27
2011
Pure awesome All-American fun
27, JunBy Katie Kieffer
By Katie Kieffer 
Apple pie. Baseball. And Disneyland? I never thought of visiting Disneyland as “All-American” recreation on par with watching a baseball game—beer in one hand, hot dog in the other. But, last week, I vacationed in California. Before I left, my friend insisted, “You have to go to Disneyland. It’s practically un-American not to go.”
Posted in Economy, Entertainment & Culture
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Jun
20
2011
Entrepreneurship helps animals
20, JunBy Katie Kieffer
By Katie Kieffer 
I’m going out on a limb with the koalas to say that entrepreneurs are better caretakers of animals and endangered species than politicians who call themselves environmentalists. Last month, the journal Nature published a study showing that mathematical models for determining species extinction are unreliable and may be leading us to overestimate extinction probabilities by up to 160 percent. The study’s authors encourage the scientific community to not become complacent, but, rather, adopt better mathematical models for forecasting extinction rates.
Jun
12
2011
Fear not, buy an iPad
12, JunBy Katie Kieffer
By Katie Kieffer If Steve Jobs’ name were Lindsay Lohan and he were looking for work starring as the wife of John Gotti Jr. in a mobster film, confrontation with the law would be the best thing that ever happened to Apple. We all know Lohan can serve jail time and then spend weeks defending herself in court on new charges only to walk away flashing an ankle monitoring bracelet above her five-inch heels and … drum roll … land an acting gig next to John Travolta. For LiLo, fighting the law appears to be a remunerative gold star on her resume. For tech companies like Apple, not so much.
Posted in Economy, Free Speech, Law
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Jun
01
2011
Why college is not for everyone
01, JunBy Katie Kieffer
By Katie Kieffer
Peter Thiel is rocking the boat of higher education. The libertarian entrepreneur, venture capitalist, and co-founder of PayPal is sending liberal college administrators into a tizzy with his latest push to encourage young innovators to ditch college for two years and pursue entrepreneurship.
Last week, Thiel awarded 20 young people with “20 Under 20” Thiel Fellowships: $100,000 and two years of mentorship to develop entrepreneurial ventures in science and technology. Continue reading
Posted in Economy, Education
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May
24
2011
Ending high gas prices
24, MayBy Katie Kieffer
By Katie Kieffer
I’m picking out bananas at the grocery store when a young woman slides up beside me and starts adding fruit to her cart while she carries on a loud cell phone conversation with a girlfriend:
“Jess, I think I’ll stay over at your place on Wednesday night, because, with gas prices so high, I just can’t justify my commute into work. I might stay over on Thursday too, but I’ll let you know.” Her dry tone made it sound like she was making a dental appointment, not planning a girls’ night with pjs and cocktails. As she jaunted off toward the broccoli, I thought, “Wow, gas prices really are dominating our lives if adults are planning weekly sleepovers to avoid driving.” Continue reading
Posted in Economy, Energy
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May
17
2011
Clinton* sweet-talks Hispanics
17, MayBy Katie Kieffer
By Katie Kieffer
Bill Clinton is the one exception to the Constitutional rule that U.S. Presidents may only serve two terms.
When President Obama went to El Paso, Texas last week and pitched his immigration reform plan to Hispanics, I felt like I was watching a movie called “Bubba’s Third Term.” The President did not sound like himself. I detected a faint Arkansas accent as he stood at the podium and outlined amnesty objectives disguised as immigration reform. Continue reading
Posted in Economy, Law, National Security
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Mar
22
2011
Play to win high-tech freedom
22, MarBy Katie Kieffer
By Katie Kieffer
Your game-day challenge is preserving your high-tech freedom. Today, I will explain your online freedom’s biggest threat and then employ NFL pep talks that will inspire you to prevail.
On Dec. 21, 2010, the FCC essentially declared that the Internet and telephone communications are the same. You know, like how water and beer are both beverages so they clearly are the same? Continue reading
Posted in Free Speech, Law
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